amperstand

I can't place a feeling on how I feel. Sad? Mad? Confused? Probably all of that and more. I have a good friend who confided in me about her struggles. She told me that in hindsight, she was most remorseful about what it did to her family. She doesn't blame herself, as she knows she has no control over it. What do I want to do? Ask her why.  Tell her she's perfectly fine the way she is. Tell her that imperfections shape us. Tell her not to stress.

It doesn't mater what I say. She has to believe it. She has to see this in herself.

She probably doesn't even fully grasp why.

I can't blame myself, but I can ask myself, did I do anything to cause this? Do I put too much pressure on her? Do I ask too much of her? Am I too demanding? I don't know. Maybe. Probably. Is that an excuse? No.

We all have a lot of issues, how we deal with them is your own choice.

As hard as I'll try not to, I'm sure at some point I'll blame my husband. I'll blame myself. I'll blame everyone around. The stress of it all will envelop us. As a family we have to take this on and not let is consume us, but strengthen us.

I'm human, human, I have faults.